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Contrary to popular media sentiment, BOTH sexes can use plastic googly eyes to accentuate their genitalia.



All articles containing: "kids"

Setting Expectations Early



Sometimes, everyone has a bad day. It's the job of parents everywhere to let kids know that nothing's ever so bad that it couldn't possibly be worse. Thus, we turn to the old standards that we all rea...(Click to see more)



Posted: Jan. 02, 2021



Shady Daycares



Child raising has many trials and tribulations. What do you feed them so they're the most healthy? How much Dora the Explorer is safe for any one creature, and is what she's exploring safe for childre...(Click to see more)



Posted: Sep. 27, 2017



Punishment Cereal



Are your kids acting up? Do you need to show them the deal and lay down the law? Are you opposed to savage beatings, and think washing their mouths out with soap is too old-fashioned? Well, do I have ...(Click to see more)



Posted: Sep. 24, 2016



Participant Awards?



We live in an age where kids get award pretty much just for showing up to school.
But why is the label so bland as to be "participant?"

Everyone has things about them that we can celebrate instea...(Click to see more)



Posted: Mar. 12, 2016



No Bully, pls!



It's back-to-school season, and this is something every parent should consider purchasing for their children. Better safe than sorry, you know....(Click to see more)



Posted: Aug. 05, 2015



The Little Engine...



Children's books should tackle more complicated subjects. They shouldn't just be empty collections of platitudes and lessons in being yourself. News flash: being yourself gets you nowhere!

So, natu...(Click to see more)



Posted: Jun. 26, 2015



Kids NEED things



Another in my series of irrelevant or oddly specific bumper stickers.
#26 - I stand by it!

To vote for this one, click and leave a comment and/or a like....(Click to see more)



Posted: Feb. 16, 2015



Honk, honk!



I've put together a collection of impractical or oddly specific bumper stickers.
This is #8.

To vote for this one, click and leave a comment and/or a like....(Click to see more)



Posted: Feb. 13, 2015



It burns!



Another in my series of irrelevant or oddly specific bumper stickers.
#21 - and oh, there's truth there.

To vote for this one, click and leave a comment and/or a like....(Click to see more)



Posted: Feb. 13, 2015



Children's Book



So, they* asked me to write a children's book, to entertain the youngsters at dentists' offices the world over.

I decided to take the approach of explaining real-world intricacies in terms kids can...(Click to see more)



Posted: Feb. 06, 2014



Kony's Kidz



Oh, that rascal Joe Kony and his army of children. Our good friends over at One-Hour Pharmacy decided to sponsor a charity campaign in order to help out those little scamps and keep them out of harm's...(Click to see more)



Posted: Apr. 26, 2012



The Fucking Tree



I had to do my own take on a timeless children's classic.

In this case, though, the tree isn't a doormat and a pushover, and doesn't let that kid use him and fuck up his entire life. But, the tree ...(Click to see more)



Posted: Feb. 17, 2012









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